Living Alone:: The Repercussions You Never Knew Existed

Ok, you found your place, you live alone (or with fur child), and have created a royal mess of what used to be a decent apartment. Some recent ruminations that I have discovered since living alone:

• You talk to yourself. A lot. And you talk to your dog/cat/fish/hamster. A lot. I have now found myself talking to myself in public places. Besides looking like a total schizo, and a person with severe mental problems and/or several imaginary friends, I have found that people do not react well to crazies mumbling to themselves. Note to self - will not attract opposite sex
• You start making noises that your 5 year old self used to find amusing. And you make up songs. And sing them to your dog. While dancing in your apartment with your work shirt on and sweatpants.
• Doing the dishes goes from a "must" to a "maybe later, or at least after this game of Mario Kart".
• That bottle of wine you used to share with someone? Well, you stopped sharing, and will finish said bottle of wine on your own. On a Tuesday evening. And are drunk. On a Tuesday evening. By yourself. In sweatpants and a work shirt, singing to your dog.
• Normal dietary options go out the window. Popcorn and wine for dinner - sure! Leftover turkey and ramen, sounds delicious! Mac & Cheese for breakfast? More like BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS!
• Hoarding occurs. All that SPACE in your OWN APARTMENT! To fill up with crap! Awesome.
• No one is there to regulate on you after a particularly fun evening, and therefore no one is telling you to go to bed. So, you wake up at 4 am with your apartment filled with smoke from the pizza you HAD TO HAVE at 2 am, and your facebook status is updated to something that is not quite coherent.
• You have worn the same sweatpants for 2 weeks in a row, and have not cleaned them.

And sometimes I wonder why I am single...